Grappling with Grammar: A Grammar Gallimaufry

Last week, a sleek black enormous Dodge Ram passed me as I was driving to school. It's back window touted an advertisement for a personal business, Custom Metalwork. The main part of the ad proclaimed the many types of metalwork available:
Chimney Caps
Planter Box's
Fireplace Hood's
Cupolas
Backsplash's
Range Hoods
(Note the two "hoods" that are punctuated differently and the other pluralized words that someone felt were in need of more than just a simple "es")
I initially intended to put this on the blog as a question of "Do the odd punctuation errors make you doubt the proficiency or professionalism of this business?" However, as I read the "Phenomenology of Error" I started to reconsider errors in language at a whole new level. What is error? I must admit I got lost and confused in the erudite language and formulas. However, what I did understand (and I could be completely wrong because of the whole "lost and confused" issue!) was that errors are not errors for everyone. What one person has written or spoken, believing that they are using the language correctly, can be "proved" to be an error by another through a different grammar book! How will anyone ever learn "correct" usage of the English language? Who will get to say it is correct? How far will we go in correcting or ignoring errors just because someone can prove or contradict the rule? Can "(range) hoods" and "(fireplace) hood's" come to mean the same thing because it is printed on the side of a truck? Where will we draw the line as teachers as to what is an error and what is a stylistic choice? Again, is "hoods" and "hood's" just a stylistic choice made to catch attention? Where do we find the answers?

Over the course of the first three days of class, I could not help but notice a theme or notion that seemed to seep its way into nearly every discussion that was had. This idea of "Standard English" is one that actually bothers me. What in English is actually deemed "Standard"? In this Wikipedia article about "Standard English" it acknowledges that:
"There are no official rules for "Standard English" because, unlike some other
languages, English does not have a linguistic governance body. . .".
I can attest to this standardization of languages due to my mission. The countries "Official Language" was Portuguese (however hardly any of the natives spoke it). With only 1/4 of my mission remaining, an official document was published by the Portuguese "linguistic governance body" that made several changes to Portuguese in order to unify Brazilian Portuguese and Portuguese from Portugal. This document no doubt caused problems because neither country (not to mention the smaller countries that also speak Portuguese) felt it necessary to make the changes in order to be more "Standard". While I acknowledge that in the afore mentioned Wikipedia article it states that:
"In countries where English is either not a native language or is not widely spoken, a
native variant (typically English English or North American English) might be
considered "standard" for teaching purposes."
we should not be so ignorant to think that OUR (American) idea of "Standard English" is more correct than that of England's idea of "Standard English". Do not forget that our language originates from Mother England. Who are we to say that our word choice (or theirs) is more appropriate? IF there were a committee to guide us, would we be quick to heed their rules if they were not in our favor?
With all of that said, may I shed more light on the beloved Oxford English Dictionary? With the development of language, the dictionary has no choice but to change in order to suit the ever expanding English Language. A lot of these changes may be unacceptable to the person dedicated to the preservation of a "pure" "Standard English" language. Words like "hella" and "Bootylicious" (please be aware that foul language is used to define these terms or their origin) have found a home in The Oxford English Dictionary. Does The Oxford English Dictionary no longer represent "Standard English"?
I do not intend to harass or demean anyone that is set on the idea of "Standard English", especially since I am well aware of my weaknesses with English grammar. I do however wish to educate people (myself included) so that as we enter our classrooms we do not remain overly closed minded and neglect the changes that our students will undoubtedly embrace and accept as "standard".